“When you give up speed, you open up time.”

I am reading Mary Pipher's book  Women Rowing North for a book group discussion later next month.
I like it more than I thought I would.  I'm only in Chapter Three - "The Worn Body" but it's a good recounting of the physical issues of being my age.

Here are some quotations from it that I like and want to think about more:

“Most discussions about memory in older people concern deterioration and loss, but such discussions miss an important phenomenon. Our minds become less cluttered and more concerned with essentials. We develop deeper and more integrated memories. Where we put our cell phone or sunglasses is background. Foreground is a mix of memories about family, friends, history, turning points, and crucible moments.” 

“The English language contains the words "poignant" and "bittersweet," but it is challenging to find other words to describe the complex emotional states we feel as we run out of time. Our inner experience is too complicated to label.

“toward our seventies, our bones, shape, vision, sense of smell and taste, and even our teeth change. We react differently to medications. We don’t tolerate the cold as well. As our skin thins, we bruise more easily and our cartilage deteriorates. We struggle with our balance and coordination. Everything seems to droop and sag.”

“As long as we can do most of what we want to do, we are young-old age. When our health fundamentally changes the way we live, we have entered old-old age.” 


“Good stories build good lives. When we are lonely we can remember our good times with loved ones, a blazing sunset, or our sixtieth birthday dinner when everyone told us precisely what they loved about us. When we reexamine our stories with a focus on clarity, acceptance, and resilience, we grow in confidence and joy. Our stories, if carefully considered allow us to heal from the pain of the past and live vibrantly in the present.
“how did I choose my friends, what did I feel passionate about, what books I enjoyed and why, and what did I think my talents were?” 
We could define wisdom as the capacity to skillfully select our narratives. We we do this, we experience our lives as filled with meaning. Every present day event resonates with the decades of past events. We can be grateful for everything that led us to the moment we are inhabiting.This is how life becomes sacred. It is hallowed by story.” 


“With each new stage of life, we outgrow the strategies that worked for us at an earlier stage. We find ourselves in an environment that pelts us with more challenges than our current self can manage. If we don't grow bigger, we can become bitter. When our problems become too big for us, our healthiest response is to expand our capacities. That growth is qualitative. We become deeper, kinder to ourselves and others, and more capable of bliss.” 

“One of the secrets of happiness is having a host of activities that we can enjoy when we are alone. The more we can do this, the more likely we are to enjoy our lives as we age.” 

The Twelve Dancing Princesses